Guilty!!!

26th June 2007
The time now is 8:33pm. I recieved a call from Cecilia to work at Times Ang Mo Kio warehouse tomorrow at 9am. I have to wake up early to avoid from being late again. I will be taking SBS25 to Ubi area to board SBS55. Oh Lord I pray that I will wake up early and won't be late for work.

Anyways, I have s much things to shout out. I can't find anyone to shout out my problems. I'm so stressed up inside. I know Lord you forgive me but I can't face the reality. I do not know who to tak to except you. I do not even know how to type it down in this blog I'm typing now. I'm so confused! I'm so stressed up now. What can I do? Please help me. Help me! I appear to be happy yet I feel so small inside. I'm feeling so small, so small that no one could find me.

Oh what am I thinking now?! I do not want to think of myself in this way. I did so many sinful things. I say I will change for the better but I ecame worse! My attitude towards lots of things are getting from bad to worse. I do not even have the rights to advise anyone. WHen I tell my younger sis not to do certain wrongdoings, I think back. I did the same wrongdoings yet I ask someone else to change. I should change myself!

I'm caught up in my own world for now. Oh Lord help me, save me. Help me fight against temptations. This is the Number1 thing I need to change. When my elder sis ask me how much I love you Lord, I say I love you with my heart. Am I loving you wholeheartedly? I'm not, and that's honest. I say for the sake of saying to please my elder sis.

Oh Lord help me find back the love that I have for you. I really can't live without you Lord! I'm feeling so lost now. I still have the smallest faith in me that believe you will save me. I know I fallen away from you. I want to get back to you Oh Lord! My mind is filled with dirty sinful stuffs! When did I ever begin those dirty sinful thoughts? I actually accepted those stuffs? Goodness me!

Some of you reading this will feel like punching or slapping me. Alright, I hereby promise those who read this blog. I promise to change for the better! I promise to be stronger in Christ name. Let's pray for a better day. Bye.